something mad

layceymurana @ 2008-06-19T20:34:00

2008-06-19T12:37:27Z

the meaning of dirty colors

2008-05-10T09:27:23Z

Brown: unsettling, distracting, materialistic, negating spirituality.

No, that can't be me.. O_O

BUT IT'S BETTER THAN BEING..

White: serious disease, artificial stimulation (drugs). Why does the white color in the Aura indicate problems? White color is like a noise, rather than a set of harmonious tones (monochromatic colors). It is impossible to "tune" the noise to an orchestra playing harmonious music, hence the white Aura indicates a lack of harmony in the body and mind. Nature, which we are a part of, is harmonious. This harmony comes in discrete vibration "tones" or harmonics, partially described by the modern quantum physics.
Several hours before the death, the Aura becomes white, and greatly increases in intensity. For this reason in most cultures "death" is depicted in WHITE (not black), because in the past, people could actually see a white Aura before death. It seems that our ancestors knew much more than we are prepared to admit.

Day Five.

2007-12-21T12:56:49Z

It has been a while since I've posted. Things have changed. I am no longer depressed. Sure, I have the occassional sigh and rush of uncomfortable feelings within me but other than that, I've been able to really laugh and just feel a bit of happiness. There's a certain freedom to what I have now and I feel 'happy'?

I'm actually not too sure if I can call what I'm feeling now 'happy'.. I mean, I don't even remember what that really feels like anymore honestly. It could be that I've reached my goal of shutting down my inner emotions.. Perhaps that's what's happened. But anyway, whatever this is.. In the spirit of the season (aka the time of temporary happiness), I've decided to not look to deep into it. I rather stay 'happy', not solve anything and just run away.. Just like what a kid would do.

I really have to thank my friends for these bits of happy feelings. Yes, my friends.. The ones who stuck to me.. who are actually supporting me.. and making me feel like I'm still here.. I know that I tried to push myself away.. but I know now that.. it's almost impossible to completely shut myself down at this point. Maybe when school comes by.. Those are the times when it really hurts anyway. But now, since it's the 'most wonderful time of the year', I'll enjoy myself.. and my friends.. But come next year.. I'm going to be a loner. Or at least, fully shut. I've got to focus on studies for that time.